In the days since I (finally) got out of Kyiv...

After being stranded in the capitol nearly a week, Nick and I finally made it back to our sites on January 6, also known as Ukrainian Christmas Eve. A little bit about this day...it’s all about food. And I mean ALL ABOUT FOOD. At the meal, there are 12 cold, meatless dishes on the table, ranging from the centerpiece (called kootya...it’s a sweet, wet kasha made with tea, candy, raisins, etc...and in my opinion the best thing on the table) to all varieties of smoked fish, open-faced sandwiches, pickles, cheese...it goes on and on. Plus there’s booze...wine, brandy, and of course vodka. Actually, the best vodka I’ve had is made right here in the Pidvolochysk region. You know how most vodka, even the so-called good stuff, has a distinct rubbing alcohol smell to it? This stuff, I kid you not, has no smell. And for that matter, no real ‘taste’. Dangerous. I’d send some home if it weren’t illegal to ship in the mail...sorry. Another incentive to visit :)

Anyway, I wish the food had ended there. But noooooooo. Basically, every day since then has been a repeat of January 6th and because they make so much of it, it just keeps reappearing till someone eats it. And not just at my host-home. EVERYWHERE. I went to ‘tea’ with Liz to her baba’s house...12 dishes later I rolled back out onto the street. Then I went to ‘tea’ with my tutor...a little less food, but still the Thanksgiving feeling. I mean, I love the Thanksgiving feeling, but not 6 days in the row. I literally think I’ve gained 10 pounds this week.

Since my birthday was this past weekend I thought we (Liz, Nick and myself) could have a temporary reprieve from the traditional dishes by volunteering to make dinner on Saturday night for a few people (the ‘Americans’, my coordinator - Inna, my tutor - Ira, and Ira’s sister - Olya). My Ukrainian is still quite limited, but when I said I wanted to make an ‘American dish’ called chili I thought I meant I wanted to make the whole meal, however, apparently the word I used for ‘dish’ meant ‘dish’, as in ‘accompaniment’ - not MEAL. So here I am, making Nick chop onions, concocting this gigantic pot of VERY spicy chili (something the Ukrainians didn’t quite know how to deal with), Liz is baking cookies and biscuits, and we’re happily thinking ‘mmmmmmm...a real American dinner Finally, no booderbrats or bearabowl ’ when my host mom, bless her, starts pulling out plate upon plate of just that...sandwiches, potatoes, pickles, houloubsi, smoked fish, random meats, cheeses, etc. Then her nephew, his wife and their son show up. At this point I’m thinking, ‘Crap, I didn’t make enough food for all these people.’ But I have never been so confused as when she literally pulled me away from the stove (where my chili was still simmering nicely) and ordered me upstairs. I quickly learned that cake comes first (complete with candles, but sans song...you get a blessing instead), then I was allowed to tend to my chili again. As for the rest of the food, my guess is that they thought I was merely making another bowl to add to the pile and that the whole town was invited. Chalk it up to another cross-cultural mis-communication. It’s funny how people can be so similar but so different. All in all, it was still a good birthday, just kinda frazzling and different. And my chili kicked major ass :) I dumped a whole packet of chili powder in it and god did it make your eyes water and your mouth burn. Mmmmmm. I think Nick, Liz and I were the only ones to eat it. In fact there have been leftovers since...I just had a nice little plate of it with some melted cheese on top. Delish.

On a tangent different than food, school started today. I’m teaching 18 classes a week - three 5th grade groups, and three 6th grade groups. The kids seem good...but who knows. Today was only the beginning and we just did arts and crafts. Since I only got the schedule this past Friday and have no idea yet what my fellow co-teachers are planning for the coming weeks (my lesson plans need to somewhat correspond) I had them make pennants about themselves...name, age, favorite things, etc. It was harder than it seems...the idea of a pennant is completely foreign. Foreign. Haha. Well...anyway...

Now one more thing. When are some of you people gonna start making some plans to come visit me ? I know you all think, ‘Why on EARTH do I want to go to Ukraine?’ Please. Besides the obvious, ME, there are lots of other reasons. Allow me to illustrate in words. After you buy your plane ticket you can quite literally live like a king for about $150 for an entire week (unless you want to buy fur...that’ll set you back a good amount...although it’s still cheaper than in the USA), the vodka is better here, pickles up the wazzooo, seeing words like ‘hleeb’ written on storefront windows is really cool (‘hleeb’ is ukrainian for ‘bread’), if you come in summer it’s light until 10:30pm (making up for the meager 8 hours of sunlight now), the food’s good - and by golly is it plentiful, and last but not least....BORSHCHT Seriously, I would love some visitors. I *might* be willing to negotiate and meet people somewhere nearby - Prague, Budapest - but you really wanna come to Ukraine at some point and I really want to show it to you. I mean, how many people get to visit the real Ukraine? How many people get to visit Ukraine, period? You know you want it...after all, Ukraine is strong

That’s it from me. I need to lesson plan. The eager kiddies will be waiting bright-eyed and bushy-tailed :)